# A light hearted thread.



## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

I was wondering how to get my post count up?


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

I've come up with a few.
1. Start a useless thread like this
2. respond to said threads.
3. say hi to everyone in the introductions forum.


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

4. Instead of editing to add something, put up a new post.


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

5. if a thread goes off topic, join in and keep it there for a while.

BTW how to you cut down the height of aluminum fascia, can't get 8.75" and no one around here does it on site. I score it with a knife and bend a few times.


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## kwikfishron (Mar 11, 2010)

mae-ling said:


> I was wondering how to get my post count up?


That's easy... just stalk Joecap and leave a useless comment after each of his post. Fallow that with your normal post and you will pass up DM in no time. :laughing:


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## AtlanticWBConst. (May 12, 2006)

Have no life and lots of free time.....?


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## danpik (Sep 11, 2011)

Or, you can always just ask for a picture


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## oh'mike (Sep 18, 2009)

AtlanticWBConst. said:


> Have no life and lots of free time.....?



Are you making fun of me????????????:laughing:


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## rossfingal (Mar 20, 2011)

How to increase your thread count?
Simple: go through all the threads here -
Add a response -
Something to the effect of -
I agree with "whoever"! -
Or -
+1 

(Or is that "whomever?)
I agree! +1

"RF"

(Of course we're not making fun of you - we're laughing with you!!!)
+1


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## rusty baker (Feb 13, 2009)

rossfingal said:


> How to increase your thread count?
> Simple: go through all the threads here -
> Add a response -
> Something to the effect of -
> ...


 Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm


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## gma2rjc (Nov 21, 2008)

Sometimes a person's post count doesn't necessarily mean anything. It's the content of those posts that matters.

I have about 3,200 posts. But that doesn't mean you should take my advice on any of your electrical problems. :no: Most likely you'd be sending me a nasty PM or calling the fire department within a day or two.

Edited to add: I've never given 'electrical' advice... that was just an example. 8o)


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## ddawg16 (Aug 15, 2011)

Sounds like an episode from Seinfeld......"Something about nothing"....or was it "Nothing about Nothing"? Or was is "Nothing about Something"?

I'm still waiting for advice on how to build my shower...I figure you could improve your post count by at least 50 on just that subject alone.....


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## kwikfishron (Mar 11, 2010)

gma2rjc said:


> a person's post count doesn't necessarily mean anything. It's the content of those posts that matters.


Couldn't agree with you more. :thumbsup:

I just upped my count by 1 with this worthless post. 

I really do agree with you.


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## kwikfishron (Mar 11, 2010)

danpik said:


> Or, you can always just ask for a picture


I'll defend this one.

More times than not a picture is worth a half a page (or more) of post here.


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## rusty baker (Feb 13, 2009)

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

ddawg16 said:


> Sounds like an episode from Seinfeld......"Something about nothing"....or was it "Nothing about Nothing"? Or was is "Nothing about Something"?
> 
> I'm still waiting for advice on how to build my shower...I figure you could improve your post count by at least 50 on just that subject alone.....


Go with the Kerdi sytem.:whistling2: You know your gonna.


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

kwikfishron said:


> I'll defend this one.
> 
> More times than not a picture is worth a half a page (or more) of post here.


"A picture is worth a thousand posts" or something like that:yes:


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## oh'mike (Sep 18, 2009)

Pick on the easy questions---Like-," I have a dripping faucet, How do I fix it?"


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## chrisn (Dec 23, 2007)

kwikfishron said:


> That's easy... just stock Joecap and leave a useless comment after each of his post. Fallow that with your normal post and you will pass up DM in no time. :laughing:


 
Here is you're chance to add to the count

stalk, maybe:whistling2:


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## kwikfishron (Mar 11, 2010)

chrisn said:


> Here is you're chance to add to the count
> 
> stalk, maybe:whistling2:


You know Chris I spelled it that way just for you and you took the bait. :jester:

What would your count be if there were no typos on this site? :huh:

One more post for each of us. :clap:


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## beenthere (Oct 11, 2008)

Post your introduction in the introduction forum. Then copy and paste it in every forum.

That will also give Jim practice removing duplicate threads and post. LOL


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## BigJim (Sep 2, 2008)

beenthere said:


> Post your introduction in the introduction forum. Then copy and paste it in every forum.
> 
> That will also give Jim practice removing duplicate threads and post. LOL


You have to watch that new guy, he ain't all there.:whistling2:


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## beenthere (Oct 11, 2008)

BigJim said:


> You have to watch that new guy, he ain't all there.:whistling2:


I think thats a requirement to be a Mod. :laughing:


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## ddawg16 (Aug 15, 2011)

So....if I use Kerdi, how do I wire my vibrating bed?


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

One more for me!
If you have a vibrating bed - use an old extension cord, preferably one with cracks in shield, run it through the shower.
Even better sensations.

Answer stupid questions with stupid answers.


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## ddawg16 (Aug 15, 2011)

mae-ling said:


> One more for me!
> If you have a vibrating bed - use an old extension cord, preferably one with cracks in shield, run it through the shower.
> Even better sensations.
> 
> Answer stupid questions with stupid answers.


 
So....how much does it cost?


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

Having standard answers is a quick way to add to your count.

Pricing questions are frowned upon here. It's like asking "how much does a car cost?" Depends on the car.

http://www.diychatroom.com/f2/how-much-will-cost-asking-price-estimates-here-127914/
Although in your case it may cost your life.


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## ddawg16 (Aug 15, 2011)

Amazed no one asked that one yet........


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## rusty baker (Feb 13, 2009)

How much wood does a woodchuck chuck?


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

Keep posts short and to the point.


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

yepps!

(has to be at least 5 characters)


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

When starting a thread, argue about every piece of advice given. When thread is hi-jacked respond individually to each hi-jacker.

Take part in hi-jackings, the mods are too busy to deal with the victims themselves.

Give erroneous, even potentially dangerous advice. Respond to each objection individually. ( Be judicious, dangerous advice may lead to inability to make any posts at all.)

Do not give detailed instructions, OP will ask for more info. Respond with least info possible, use terms newbies are unfamiliar with, leading to requests for more info, creating self feeding circle.

Put off your own projects to become involved in OP's.


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## chrisn (Dec 23, 2007)

kwikfishron said:


> You know Chris I spelled it that way just for you and you took the bait. :jester:
> 
> What would your count be if there were no typos on this site? :huh:
> 
> One more post for each of us. :clap:


 
10 or 12:wink:


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

Obviate the use of PM's. Ask off topic questions of other posters. For example, chrisn can now ask kwikfishron, "While I have you on the line, can you tell me of any good fishing holes?"


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## JasperST (Sep 7, 2012)

notmrjohn said:


> When starting a thread, argue about every piece of advice given.


I disagree with that.


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## Canucker (May 5, 2011)

notmrjohn said:


> Keep posts short and to the point.


That's right, notmrjohn, no meandering. I usually don't have enough bread crumbs to get home after reading some of yours. :laughing:


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

Respond to all arguments; Jasper, no you don't.

Tell other responders that there's a better way than there's; canucker, bread is not up to code here, you are required to tie a string to first word in my posts, follow it back when you reach sig line.

Tell responders their idea is not up to code, even if you do not know the codes where they are, its bound to be not code somewhere.


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## JasperST (Sep 7, 2012)

notmrjohn said:


> Respond to all arguments; Jasper, no you don't.


You're just trying to get your post count up!


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

give information that is not relevant.

Hansel and Gretel were able to follow the bread crumbs to get back.


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

jasper, no I'm not.


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

mae-ling, no they weren't, birds ate the crumbs, the witch got 'um. The witch's house was not built to code.Ginger bread should never be used for load bearing walls. And she used "No Primer Needed" interior icing on exterior.


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

Oh yes that is right, birds ate crumbs.
(give wrong answer so get corrected then agree)


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

No problem.

(acknowledge agreement with correction of erroneous info)


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## rossfingal (Mar 20, 2011)

Let's get back to the subject -
"post count".
Get into your car -
drive along a nice, country road -
count the posts that you see.
Simple! 
"RF"


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## Canucker (May 5, 2011)

notmrjohn said:


> canucker, bread is not up to code here, you are required to tie a string to first word in my posts, follow it back when you reach sig line.
> 
> Tell responders their idea is not up to code, even if you do not know the codes where they are, its bound to be not code somewhere.


It was code when I started on the post. Can I extend it with string? Don't tell me I can't extend bread crumb trails with string. Licensed posters tell me it's not allowed but won't hurt anything. Never mind, it's my trail and there's no inspectors here, so I'll do what I want. ha!:thumbup:


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

Tell people not to string string from HD or other big box, they only sell cheap imported string. All string must come from real string store or string supply house. Especially when stringer lives in rural area full of posts but far from material sources.


While driving along counting posts, knock down mail boxes, start thread denying full financial responsibility for replacing box. That's sure to start long thread with many opportunities to post.


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## chrisn (Dec 23, 2007)

notmrjohn said:


> mae-ling, no they weren't, birds ate the crumbs, the witch got 'um. The witch's house was not built to code.Ginger bread should never be used for load bearing walls. And she used "No Primer Needed" interior icing on exterior.


 
I heard she used this
Even worse than icing:yes:


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

She used these to put it on. I hear it took 3 coats. No wait that was Goldilocks that used the three behrs.
( Do not pass up opportunity to make bad pun.)


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## JasperST (Sep 7, 2012)

notmrjohn said:


> She used these to put it on. I hear it took 3 coats. No wait that was Goldilocks that used the three behrs.
> ( Do not pass up opportunity to make bad pun.)


It took three coats because she was a thinner. A voice said "You have thinned! Repaint and thin no more!"


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## creeper (Mar 11, 2011)

groan...Hey Nathan, we should have a no thankyou button


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## ddawg16 (Aug 15, 2011)

Oh lord, I can't Behr to read any more....


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## Canucker (May 5, 2011)

mae-ling said:


> I was wondering how to get my post count up?


4 easy steps.
1. Move to Mesquite, Texas.
2. Become the south end of a north bound horse
3. Bring dynamite for your new reno business
4. Ask questions here on how to fix what you started with the dynamite
:jester:


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## Canucker (May 5, 2011)

creeper said:


> groan...Hey Nathan, we should have a no thankyou button


No comments from the peanut gallery. Especially the ones responsible for this 10 page wonderment. lol http://www.diychatroom.com/f39/girl-youre-my-darling-angel-154741/:jester::laughing:


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## Dan101 (Jul 1, 2007)

followed this one to here and now I am really confused but I learned alot about string and theads


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## creeper (Mar 11, 2011)

Canucker said:


> No comments from the peanut gallery. Especially the ones responsible for this 10 page wonderment. lol http://www.diychatroom.com/f39/girl-youre-my-darling-angel-154741/:jester::laughing:


 
Don't forget about ; 

Michael Phelps
Hi Buddy
Hey Doc
Hey Lover
I'm in love
and countles other threads that we highjacked.. :laughing:


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## TheEplumber (Jul 20, 2010)

I can't believe I read all this....
I'm going back to the plumbing board- no, not the one that issued my license :whistling2:


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## rossfingal (Mar 20, 2011)

Strings -
Posts -
I can hardly "Behr" this!!
Speaking of string -
I get all my string at the Quantum Physics, String Theory Store -
never, at one of them, there "Big Box" stores!
According to "String Theory" - there isn't 3 dimensions + time -
there's something in the order of 21 to 26 dimensions!
I always thought there was "X", "Y", "Z" axis -
you know "Level", "Plumb", and "Square" -
Time?!?
We all strive to do things in a "timely" fashion.
"Yeah, I know, we said it would take 3 days and we've been here for a week".
"What kind of a job do you want"?
"Good, Bad, or Ugly"?!? (Decent movie! - Thanks Clint!)
Sorry, I didn't mean to "string" you along - I think it's "time" to close
this "post" out.
(Ha, ha, ha - I covered "string", "time", and "post" - all at once!)
I'm getting kind of "strung" out with this "post" -
I think it's "time" to end it!!!
He, he, he!!
+1 
"RF"


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## JasperST (Sep 7, 2012)

rossfingal said:


> According to "String Theory" - there isn't 3 dimensions + time - there's something in the order of 21 to 26 dimensions!


21 to 26? I call BS! According to my Fluke there are only 11.


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## oh'mike (Sep 18, 2009)

Good grief----this thread makes no sense----I'm going back to the spam spotting site---


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## ddawg16 (Aug 15, 2011)

oh'mike said:


> Good grief----this thread makes no sense----I'm going back to the spam spotting site---


Is that not the intent? It worked for Seinfeld....


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

"-this thread makes no sense" That's because you don't sense the gravity of the situation. I used to get my gravity at the Big Bang Store, now i get it wholesale at the dimensional supply house. Black Hole Brand, extra concentrated, you have to dilute it with Inter-Stellar matter, but it covers in one coat, no prime directive needed. Just don't spill it on the Space Time Continuum . 

Yummmm- Spotted Spam with a big ladle of gravity.

here's a pic of some unlicensed boards, showing proper alignment of plumb bob in the 17th dimension. ( Plumb Bob is just a nick-name, actual name is Absolute Robert.)


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## JasperST (Sep 7, 2012)

Plumb Bob had a hard time because, as we know, due to quantum mechanics, there are no absolutes in the universe, merely the illusion given your impression from your relative time/space vantage point. While it may not look plumb to you, it's perfectly fine in his universe.


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

kwikfishron said:


> That's easy... just stalk Joecap and leave a useless comment after each of his post. Fallow that with your normal post and you will pass up DM in no time. :laughing:


I agree. 
BTW You misspelled "fellow."
To save valuable time, just quote the post and add "I agree"


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

notmrjohn said:


> I agree.
> BTW You misspelled "fellow."
> To save valuable time, just quote the post and add "I agree"


I disagree. Save even more time by just quoting and adding nothing.


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

notmrjohn said:


> I disagree. Save even more time by just quoting and adding nothing.


nothing


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## rossfingal (Mar 20, 2011)

oh'mike said:


> Good grief----this thread makes no sense----I'm going back to the spam spotting site---


"Good grief"?
Huh!?!
Who are we talking to "Charlie Brown"?!?

"Thread"?
Speaking of "thread" -
I like to take some threads - twist them together, and make some string!
Then, I take the string and use it to line up -
Wait for it!!!
"POSTS"!!
Most excellent!!! 
(Speaking of "posts" - what's my "post count" up to??)
Guess I got to take a drive in the country: and, count some more posts!!
+1 
rossfingal
+1 

(By the way - if you're going to get some "spam" - can you pick up some pineapple slices, too!?!)
+1


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

another way to get your post count up is to wait till a thread is dead, then post one last time.
If others post also, you can do it over and over.


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## gma2rjc (Nov 21, 2008)

You have post #67, but I doubt that anyone will add another post to make #68 in this thread. 
It's just not likely to happen. 
\
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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

mae-ling said:


> another way to get your post count up is to wait till a thread is dead, then post one last time.
> If others post also, you can do it over and over.


And over.

And now over to our Eye in the Forum Reporter, Chip Chap, out in the thread, what's the post count look like out there, Chip?

Well, Dooey, there was a minor jam at post 67 when ross made a post that could have been broken down into several smaller ones and at 61 some idiot wasted valuable posting time searching through files for a pointless picture.
But the OP made it through those jams and mae-ling may lengthen the post count, which is slowly but surely adding up. This is Chip Chap taking you back to Dooey Chit-Chat in the DYI Chatroom studios.


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

I guess useless babble is another way to add to your post count.


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## ddawg16 (Aug 15, 2011)

Is it Miller time yet?


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## JasperST (Sep 7, 2012)

ddawg16 said:


> Is it Miller time yet?


It's 5pm somewhere, why not?


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

"I guess...." guessing is unprofessional, or didn't you learn that lesson from what happened to poor joe?

Besides, it was pointless babble, not useless as it did increase post count. And I thought that was the point. Wait, if that was the point then....

( Don't waste time with logic, just post meaningless babble.)


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

74 posts in this useless thread = We need to get a life!


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

I have a life, according to the Mailbox Murderer its pathetic, I prefer to view it as useless. Correspondeo ergo sum.
*
*


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## gma2rjc (Nov 21, 2008)

You shouldn't trust that Mailbox Murderer because he's a liar. Other than that, I'm sure he's an okay guy.... but not when he kills mailboxes. He could get a $500 fine for something like that.


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## rossfingal (Mar 20, 2011)

Wow!
I'm impressed!
74 posts in a thread! (even if it's "useless"!)
+1 

A long time ago - in a "bygone" era -
I started a thread -
Currently it's at 1060 replies and 26,174 views!
That's timely, pertinent content!
(No need for applause!) 

By the way - a number of the moderators participated in that!
(Names withheld to protect the innocent!)
+1 

Happy Halloween!
(I think this thread is going to be, up to - 77!)
(I try to do what I can - no thanks necessary! 

Yours truly! -
rossfingal
(I've got a new thread up my "sleeve"!!!)
+1 
(Video at 11:00!)


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

I want to thank all who posted to this we have managed to increase our post counts.
None as much as MR. Not though!


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

Now If I would have thanked every post I really would have gotten my count up.
Don't use that "thanks" button - It's for wussies!!!!


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## rossfingal (Mar 20, 2011)

mae-ling said:


> Now If I would have thanked every post I really would have gotten my count up.
> Don't use that "thanks" button - It's for wussies!!!!


I agree!
"Ditto"
+ 1 
rossfingal
(Happy Halloween!)


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

rossfingal said:


> I agree!
> "Ditto"
> + 1
> rossfingal
> (Happy Halloween!)


I disagree
"De-ditto"....un-ditto?....nonditto?
Lessee its Italian, so it must be annulla ditto.

I think I used to know her, Annulla Ditto, used to work at the Pizza Parlour. No matter what you ordered you got the same thing as the last time you were there.


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## BigJim (Sep 2, 2008)

mae-ling said:


> Now If I would have thanked every post I really would have gotten my count up.
> Don't use that "thanks" button - It's for wussies!!!!


Man, that hurts right there.:laughing:


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## beenthere (Oct 11, 2008)

rossfingal said:


> A long time ago - in a "bygone" era -
> I started a thread -
> Currently it's at 1060 replies and 26,174 views!



I just pruned it, it now only has 212 post. 26,175 views.


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

beenthere said:


> I just pruned it, it now only has 212 post. 26,175 views.


 Where is it? I'll contradict each and everything in it, increase it's and my post count, increase it's views, not my own, not able to look at self in mirror, as avatar makes clear.


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## rossfingal (Mar 20, 2011)

beenthere said:


> I just pruned it, it now only has 212 post. 26,175 views.


Thanks for your help!! 
"RF"

("Where is it"? - it's buried in the boiling, roiling, morass of threads and posts -
here at "DIY"!)

Hey - while you moderators are dealing with "Spam" - could you please, remove all the
"Spam" from by "In-boxes"?!?
That's not too much to ask? - is it???
Thanks!!


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## beenthere (Oct 11, 2008)

rossfingal said:


> Hey - while you moderators are dealing with "Spam" - could you please, remove all the
> "Spam" from by "In-boxes"?!?
> That's not too much to ask? - is it???
> Thanks!!


But we're the ones that sent it to you.


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## rossfingal (Mar 20, 2011)

beenthere said:


> But we're the ones that sent it to you.


I wish all the "Spam" came from this place!!!
I could put up with that!
Jeesh!
Some of it's ridiculous!


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

"Some of it's ridiculous!"
That's what I sent. But its not Spam, its its inferior rip off "Treet" made with organ "meat" including Beef Hearts. Say that fast, you'll appreciate the effort involved in chasing bees around with little gas collectors to bring you such a gastronomical delight.


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## ddawg16 (Aug 15, 2011)

Meanwhile back at the ranch where grandma is beating off the Indians......and they just keep on coming and coming....


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

Granma should never have tried ranching in Hindustan. There's no market for beef and there are millions of Indians.

Ten to go for century mark. Who will lucky poster be?


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## JasperST (Sep 7, 2012)

Holy Cow.


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

After a long scientific research method I've concluded the top way to increase your post count is indeed useless babble.


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

To inspire useless babble, start a useless thread.
Keep your babble short, put each bab in separate post.

"Holy Cow." That's no bull.


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## beenthere (Oct 11, 2008)

Please don't post in threads you believe were made by a spammer.


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

48 hours, i haven't posted in this useless thread. I seem to be OK, no trauma, traumamama, tra, tra tra tra.... tra la la, la la laaaaa. lalala laaaa la la.


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## ddawg16 (Aug 15, 2011)

It is estimated that 79.35% of all statistics are made up.


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## notmrjohn (Aug 20, 2012)

79.35 bottles of beer in the hall,
79.35 bottles I fear.
Shake one up,
Take a big gulp,
Beer comes out your ear.


79.34 bottles....
I think I just discovered extremely easy way to increase count. But when it gets down to 3.2 beer, I'm out.


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## Canucker (May 5, 2011)

Holy zombie thread, Batman! It just won't die!:laughing:


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

Yeah I figured it was dead at 73 - but it just keeps on tickin


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## gma2rjc (Nov 21, 2008)

I wonder if it will get to #100.

:whistling2:


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## rossfingal (Mar 20, 2011)

gma2rjc said:


> I wonder if it will get to #100.
> 
> :whistling2:


Ha, ha, ha!!!
Nice job kid!!! 
+1


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## mae-ling (Dec 9, 2011)

The scam warning thread is at 101.


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## rossfingal (Mar 20, 2011)

Thanks for the warning!
+1


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## Jess_718 (Oct 15, 2012)

Great Post! I needed to know the same answer to your question!!!


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